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1.2.26
My friend saw Daffodils in November last year and now I’m seeing them before spring. I can’t help but find it horrifying despite it being a beautiful thing.
My friend saw Daffodils in November last year and now I’m seeing them before spring. I can’t help but find it horrifying despite it being a beautiful thing.
There seems to be a looming countdown, a sweeping blanket over all things calling their time in this world. I think we can all see it too. There is only a couple of months before I graduate, and whilst I have the comfort of a masters and a wonderful place to live, the world has never seemed so unfamiliar. Who will any of us be in this industry? Next week I am on a panel discussing the use of AI within our uni and the world as a whole and it’s hard not to be twinged with pessimism. We huddle together and talk about what to do next; where to move, what jobs to persue, what life to lead, but there is always an undertone of apprehension and doubt. It’s only natural for this time of year, our lives are going to be drastically different and probably uncomfortable with the growing pains of postgrad life. It is only now though that this feels different, as we make environmental art and practice sustainability, as we talk about collective love and empowerment, our surrounding world seems only harsher against it. There is yet another storm incoming, they haven’t stopped all month. There are daffodils in january, a month earlier every year.
In these endings I have found myself having to do endless journalling to understand exactly how I feel (subject to change). The people around me surround me with miraculous faith and, whilst they are not far from leaving, this feeling is not going to go anywhere. To be steadfast and to choose to be happy regardless of the world is possibly the most powerful thing to do. My art and my practice as a whole is rooted in this philosophy and I see no reason to change this now in face of this uncertainty.
In times where we question the most, and feel our deepest sorrows, the only thing to do is find meaning in why we choose to be alive every day. I found meaning outside today on one of my weekly runs, it was brisk and harsh but gold seeped through the cracks in the sky. Children were cycling past me through the puddles on what I presume were new bikes from christmas and people were stopped to stare at the waves. I love every day even when they are challenging because there is always new mundane magic. The clouds will always be different, the conversations elevated and everchanging, and the routine ever so slightly altered.
The world I love is dying and there is nothing I can do to change it. But as all I love comes to an end, there comes oppertunity for renewal and rebirth. I dont need to fear because I will always find the happiness that belongs to me. My people will never be destroyed because the impending end comes for all things including that which seeks to destroy us.
In times where we question the most, and feel our deepest sorrows, the only thing to do is find meaning in why we choose to be alive every day. I found meaning outside today on one of my weekly runs, it was brisk and harsh but gold seeped through the cracks in the sky. Children were cycling past me through the puddles on what I presume were new bikes from christmas and people were stopped to stare at the waves. I love every day even when they are challenging because there is always new mundane magic. The clouds will always be different, the conversations elevated and everchanging, and the routine ever so slightly altered.
The world I love is dying and there is nothing I can do to change it. But as all I love comes to an end, there comes oppertunity for renewal and rebirth. I dont need to fear because I will always find the happiness that belongs to me. My people will never be destroyed because the impending end comes for all things including that which seeks to destroy us.